META - ENGLISH - September 15, 1999

META, March 15, 2000

 

The Spiritual Translator Newsletter

 

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IN META TODAY

 

1.  35 YEARS OF TRANSLATION

2. QUOTES XXIV

3. CLIPPINGS FROM THE NEWSPAPERS

4. A FRIEND THAT'S ALWAYS THERE

 

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1. 35 YEARS OF TRANSLATION

 

I have been in the translation business (with ups and downs) for the past 35 years and the profession has changed dramatically. I started to translate in 1966 in Germany on the American Base of Frankfurt/Main. Then I came to Canada, passed the exam to enter as a translator in the Federal Government in Ottawa and started my desk job in July 1967! Yes, this is what it was... a desk job. We were only 300 translators in Ottawa at that time.  We were alone with our typewriter, our blank page and our English text. We had a library and the Terminology Section just started in the Blackburn Building, 55 Sparks Street on the fifth floor, in a room full of drawers with index cards in alphabetical order.

 

When I looked at the old translators, most of them were old bachelors, they were flabby from the lack of exercise, antisocial, introverted intellectuals. Each one had his idea of what the translation should be, they knew a lot of things because they were always looking for references in the library, consulting dictionaries and Encyclopedias and it could be interesting to talk to them. Still, I was young and when I looked at them I did not want to become like them and lead a solitary life behind my desk.

 

At that time the prestigious position for translators was with the United Nations. At the beginning of the sixties, I went with my father to Geneva to see what were the prerequisites to enter the School of Translation and Interpretation. If you had your diploma from that school, you were almost sure to enter the United Nations. There was also a school in Paris and another in Brussels. I was not aware of other schools in Europe and the translation profession was not a place to make money as my father would put it.

 

I left the Government after 14 months as a "civil servant" and went back to study for my Master and Doctorate in literature and linguistics. I started teaching translation in the Universities as, suddenly in Canada, with the new bilingualism and biculturalism that Trudeau started in 1968, the country needed more and more translators. When I was teaching in Laval in 1975, the number of translators had risen from 300 to 3,000 civil servants and the Federal Government was pushing the Universities to create new translation programs.

 

In the eighties, many young B.A.'s in translation wanted to become a "civil servant" and many did. Some loved the safety and security of the environment and stayed, moving up to administration positions and leaving the translation behind. Others, who really enjoyed translating, went "in the world" and started working for agencies. In Canada, bilingualism was extended "officially" to New Brunswick, Manitoba, Alberta but most of all to Ontario at the end of 1986. There was a rush of translators (including myself.... now you know why I am in Toronto) towards this golden opportunity and all this work flowing from Toronto! In Europe, the European Community also created in Brussels, Strasbourg and La Haye (The Hague) new positions for translators. This time, it is not just in 2 languages but in all the languages of the EC.

 

In the nineties, came Internet. Well, I do not have to elaborate on that. Half of the translators in my age group have not joined the Internet community of translators... and will not as such, except by having an email address, but as you know this is not enough. But to all the young and middle-age translators who read these lines, I just wanted to tell you that our profession has come a long way in the past 35 years in Europe as in North America and that for the past 3 years, we have seen a proliferation of translators all over the world because of the need for instant communication in all languages. The result is that anybody who speaks and writes 2 languages is trying to get a portion of it and that the old and experienced translators have to compete price-wise with inexperienced and untrained people. The translation market right now is a jungle and everybody is trying to step on the heads of the others in order to get his/her piece of meat. Today those who make money in the translation business are not the translators... they are businessmen with little computer knowledge (mostly they know how to talk nicely to people and to add and subtract numbers). I know translation agencies with managers who know nothing about translation but they are making millions.

 

I have on my site a list of 157 languages and also in descending order the most important languages in the world in terms of number of people speaking them. Nothing to do with the official languages in the United Nations or with the economic or political power of the countries where these languages are spoken which is much more relevant for the money market! I will tell you the type of contracts and languages I am getting from all the over the world in my next "delirium tremens".

 

We are very far from the old bachelor working on his typewriter!

 

 

AND NOW LET US LAUGH...

 

 

2. QUOTES XXIV

 

"What a life. When I was a kid I asked my dad if I could go ice skating. He told me to wait until it gets warmer."      Rodney Dangerfield

 

"One can't judge Wagner's opera Lohengrin after a first hearing, and I certainly don't intend hearing it a second time."      Gioacchino Rossini

 

"I've always ordered beverages one simple way: 'A Coke, please.' Lately, though, this hasn't seemed to work. Waitresses now often respond, 'I'm sorry, we don't have Coke. We have Pepsi, Diet Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, Mr. Pibb.' Tired of listening to the long list of soft drinks, I thought I'd make life easier. So one day I simply asked the snackbar clerk at a movie theater for a 'dark carbonated beverage.' The young man behind the counter chuckled and asked, 'Ma'am, would you like a cylindrical plastic sucking device with that?'"      Unknown

 

"I want to die like my Grandfather, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car."      Unknown

 

"The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house."      Jeff Foxworthy

 

"I'm very, very jealous. Sometimes I walk down the street and I see a beautiful woman and I think to myself: "I'll bet my boyfriend would like to sleep with her" and I get SO ANGRY. I run right home and smack him, and say "How much more of this do you think I can take?"      Denise Munro

 

"It's good to be back in New York but the crime situation has gotten bad.  When I was getting off the plane the pilot was putting the 'club' on the sheering wheel."      John Mendoza

 

"Do you remember those people who said that movie theater popcorn is bad for you, Chinese food is bad for you?  These people are from the Center of Science in the Public Interest.  They now say that sandwiches are bad for you because of the high fat content.  Anything with mayo, cheese or meat is bad for you. Do you realize that all those years when you were a kid and you carried your lunch to school, the Twinkie was probably the healthiest thing in there?"      Jay Leno

 

"The last time I tried to get into the normal work force the guy told me I had to wear high heels.  I'll wear the high heels but I am going to need a handicapped parking space."      Margaret Smith

 

"About the only people who listen to both sides of an argument are the next door neighbors."      Unknown

 

"I was an ugly kid, too. I was so ugly that my mother breast fed me through a straw."    Rodney  Dangerfield

 

"The secret of success is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake those, you've got it made."      Groucho Marx

 

"I asked my wife the other day, 'Will you love me when I'm old and senile?' She said, 'Of course I do.'"

      Unknown

 

"I spent more than two hours in the beauty shop getting my hair permed, cut and styled.  Relieved to be done, I went up to the receptionist to pay.  "Good afternoon!" she said cheerfully.  "And who's your appointment with today?"      Kenna Latwesen

 

"Did you hear about the new teenage Barbie?  You wind it up, and it resents you."      Jay Trachman

 

"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian."      Dennis Wholey

 

"I say, why pay outrageous prices for ski trips when I can just stick my face in the freezer and fall down on the kitchen floor?"      John Wagner

 

"I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that."      Ellen DeGeneres

 

"I was walking down the street and saw a sign on a post. It said: 'Lost  $50. If found, just keep it.'"

      Steven Wright

 

 

3. CLIPPINGS FROM THE NEWSPAPERS

 

 

 Who Was That Masked Man

 

BILLINGS, Montana  A man after spending two years in prison for bank robbery filed an appeal for wrongful imprisonment. He claimed innocence even though his partner in crime clearly identified him. He had a unique defense which proved fatal to his cause. Transcripts of the appeal revealed a clever, if unconvincing argument. He thought that the tellers could not have possibly identified him correctly. Among his more unforgettable quotes were, "How could the people in the bank have identified me? I had a mask on when I did the job." His appeal was denied. [In America a man is innocent until proven to be a complete idiot.]

 

 

 Man Gets Ticket For Eating A Peanut

 

LINCOLN, Nebraska  A truck driver who cracked opened a one cent peanut at a grocery store and ate it has been ticketed for theft. Xavier Ocampo admitted to eating the peanut and offered to pay the store the penny. But employees refused payment and called police instead. [The last time I drove through Nebraska I took some little jelly tubs from a roadside dinner. I wonder what the locals would have done if they found that out?]

 

 

 Once Is Not Enough

 

PHILADELPHIA, Pennsylvania  Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to be shot? Well Phil Horner did and wanted to do something about it, so he took a gun and shot himself in the shoulder. While this may sound bizarre, it gets even more weird. Recently a 911 call came in to dispatch and an ambulance was once again sent to the Horner residence. It seems that he shot himself one more time. The reason? In

his own words, "I wanted to see if it hurt as much as it did the first time."

 

 

 Junior Entrepreneur Nabbed In Prostitution Ring

 

LONDON, England  A 13yearold boy has been convicted of operating a prostitution ring at his local school. He recruited seven girls from the school and explained what he wanted them to do. After recruiting his "ladies", this enterprising little pimp recruited the little "Johns," also from his school. He charged them 10 pounds ($25) each for an hour. [If this had happened in Nevada the local Chamber of Commerce would have given him a citation.]

 

 

 Man Pays $67,000 For Shave

 

BEIRUT, Lebanon  Sami Shour may have been looking to get a free shave when he traded a half share of his $3.30 lottery ticket to his barber, but when the ticket won $134,000 Shour was as good as his word. The construction worker and his barber, Abu Fares Tafla, split the prize money for $67,000 each.

 

 

...AND LET US OPEN OUR HEART.

 

 

4. A FRIEND THAT'S ALWAYS THERE

 

IF I COULD CATCH A RAINBOW

I WOULD DO IT JUST FOR YOU

AND SHARE WITH YOU ITS BEAUTY

ON THE DAYS YOU'RE FEELING BLUE

 

IF I COULD BUILD A MOUNTAIN

YOU COULD CALL YOUR VERY OWN

A PLACE TO FIND SERENITY

A PLACE TO BE ALONE

 

IF I COULD TAKE YOUR TROUBLES

I WOULD TOSS THEM IN THE SEA

BUT ALL THESE THINGS I'M FINDING

 ARE IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME

 

I CANNOT BUILD A MOUNTAIN

OR CATCH A RAINBOW FAIR

BUT LET ME BE WHAT I KNOW BEST

A FRIEND THAT'S ALWAYS THERE.

 

Contribution Maria Eugenia Olivares (Peru)

 

 

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"At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done. We will be judged by "I was hungry and you gave me to eat, I was naked and you clothed me, I was homeless and you took me in."

 

Hungry not only for bread but hungry for love.

 

Naked not only for clothing but naked for human dignity and respect.

 

Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks but homeless because of rejection.

 

Mother Teresa, 1910-1997

 

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